


Home Improvement

by neverthelessthesun



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: BAMF Pepper Potts, Domestic Avengers, Everyone is sassy and nothing hurts, Ficlet, Fluff, Gen, Home Improvement, Pizza, Repetitive Unexplained Destruction of Stark Property, Tony Is a Good Bro, anti-Doombot no-bake cookies, cameo by a hard hat, it's a thing i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-05-11
Packaged: 2018-03-30 03:15:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3920899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverthelessthesun/pseuds/neverthelessthesun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A ficlet I wrote with the prompt, "They only destroyed the kitchen twice."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home Improvement

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for popping in to read my little fic! Kudos are appreciated.

THEY only destroyed the kitchen twice. The third time, it was the doombots, and times four and five weren’t really Clint’s fault, they were SHIELD’s. The sixth time, they had agreed to never speak about again. The seventh time was honestly bad luck–a recalled stovetop caught fire. That time hardly counts anyway, because the kitchen wasn’t destroyed, it just smelled like charred cabinetry for a week.   
So, really, two times isn’t THAT much of a track record. That’s why Tony had the audacity to talk back to Pepper on the eighth time.   
“What makes you think it was OUR fault?!” He moaned dejectedly. That phrase was as old as Tony himself, excepting the new use of “our” instead of “my”. He liked it.   
“You’ve been at fault before,” Pepper snarked (or snipped, but Tony was seventy percent sure it’s snark. She can’t be THAT mad.) back at him. “If I have to permanently add "residential floor repairs” to the budget, I’d like to know before repair number nine.“  
"Oh, no. Don’t turn this into a work thing. Pep, Pepper, sweetums, don’t turn on me for my own company.”  
“Too late. Your stocks this period are so much better looking than you.” And yeah, she’s definitely snarking now.   
Tony clutched his chest, wounded. “My own stocks. I can’t go on.” She levels her famous look at him, and he groans. “Fine. But I’m not coming to the wedding.”  
“You’d be too busy cleaning up the kitchen to come anyway,” she kisses his cheek before he steps into the elevator. “Go help Steve.” Tony grumbled something about being godfather to her kids before JARVIS whisked him away to the Avengers’ communal floor.   
Steve was, in fact, cleaning what’s left of the kitchen. He made a picture wearing an apron and a yellow hard hat, switching between sweeping up debris and demolishing the smoking remains of the counter with a sledgehammer. Tony spared a few seconds to let the absurdity of his life sink in. Then he spared a few more to watch the muscles roll in Steve’s arms, because, yum. When he finally announced himself, there’s no way that super soldier hearing hadn’t picked him up.  
“Pepper is blaming us for exploding the fridge,” Tony whined.   
“To be fair,” Steve chided lightly, “ it’s probably more our fault than the refrigerator’s.”  
Tony crossed his arms like an angry child. “She’s getting married to the company and I won’t be there.” Steve glanced at him, then turned back to cleaning.   
“That’ll show ‘er,” the back of his hard hat replied. Tony didn’t appreciate the hard hat’s attitude.   
“Steeeeeeve,” he whined again. “This is MY tower.”   
Steve’s raised eyebrow over his shoulder conveyed “And…?” perfectly, the bastard. “Grab a broom then,” he replied. Tony stuck out his tongue.   
That was what led up to Natasha finding them picking through the wreckage, trading teasing barbs. “So gentlemen, I assume that’s a 'still in development’ on the anti-Doombot no-bake cookies?” Steve nodded. Tony huffed. Nat smirked. “Want a hand?” She offered.  
In this manner, the rest of the team trickled in and started helping out. JARVIS had already ordered replacement cabinets, counters, and appliances–rush delivery of course–so the kitchen looked mostly back to normal by dinner. Clint had painted over the scorch marks on the ceiling, and Thor was surprisingly adept at tiling. All in all, home improvement was considered a success.   
Around the ten boxes of pizza that evening, Bruce joked to Tony, “So how do you feel about gardening?” No one missed the contemplative look he had for the rest of the night.  
Two weeks later, the Avengers we’re proud creators of a two-story greenhouse on the roof. Tony had to give up one of his (three) Iron Man launch pads, but they all agreed it was worth it. And if Fury pimped them out to MI6 when Dr. Strange attacked their HQ and they needed a remodel, nobody had to know.


End file.
